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Title:Nintendo Partners With Meme To Promote The Italian Lifestyle


Summary: This is how Italians play Mario Kart.

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Title:Ubisoft Faces Hostile Takeover, I Guess That's Probably Supposed To Be Bad


Summary: I sure hope nothing happens to Ubisoft, that'd be a real shame if something happened.

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Title:Kingdom Hearts 3 And Final Fantasy VII Remake Release Date Confirmed, NASA Partnership And Cryostasis Program Revealed


Summary: Availability is limited, reserve your spot now or start having kids and hope one of them may get to play it someday.

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Title:The Number One Reason To Come To Brazil


Summary: Right next to the riots that come after the game.

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Title:Dark Souls Gets An Official Hentai Spin-Off Where You Eat Anime Buttholes


Summary: New slogan "Prepare to Dine" promises lots of hot anime action.

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Title:Trump Takes The Spotlight In Newly Announced Call Of Duty: WWIII


Summary: Activision embraces the motto "Make Call of Duty Great Again".

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Title:Nintendo Stopped Making NES Classics And Is Getting Back Into Lingerie For Kids


Summary: Hey man, I don't make the news, I'm just reporting on it. This is legal out there, okay?

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Title:Someone Made The Skeleton War Into An Anime And I'm Very Disappointed


Summary: How dare they make a mockery of the good skeletons that put their calcium on the line for our freedom.

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Title:The Other, Not As Cool Pokemon Go That's Not Quite As Helpful For Abducting Kids


Summary: Hillary Clinton didn't play it either, that's how you know it wasn't as good.

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Title:New DLC Announced For Popular Japanese Sex Robot Game, I'm Gonna Nut To It


Summary: DLC is only ever okay if you can nut to it.